Why my home toilet was “different” than the hospital (and other logistics)


When I was heading into surgery, I spent so much time thinking about the hospital that I didn't think much about the spaces I’d be living in afterward.

First, there was the recovery stay. My parents and I got to our recovery apartment, and I realized we made a classic mistake: We packed like we were moving in forever.

We had so much stuff it took multiple elevator trips to get to the 7th floor. At one point, I was stuck in the elevator alone, trying to hold the door open while unloading a mountain of household items. It was embarrassing, exhausting, and totally unnecessary.

Pack lightly. Most household items can be bought once you arrive at your destination. Save your energy for healing, not hauling multiple bags.

The next unfortunate thing happened when I finally got back to my own house.

I thought I had my bathroom routine figured out. At the recovery apartment, everything was fine. But the day I got home? Urine was shooting straight out of the toilet.

It turns out, my home toilet was smaller and shorter than the one I’d been using for weeks at my recovery place. Because I was still propping (using the cloud dressing and mesh underwear), my penis was angled in a way that didn't match the toilet bowl at home.

I had to learn to tilt my pelvis down and gently push on the dressing to lower the angle. Once I stopped propping, the issue disappeared but it was messy at first.

Your environment will change as you move from the hospital to recovery housing, and finally back to your own home. You have to be ready to adjust your system on the fly based on the layout of each place.

Keep your setup lean and functional. Focus on the medical essentials, not bringing everything you own.

Stay Steady,

Brett Lighthouse Transitions

P.S. I’m putting the finishing touches on Deep Water: The Phalloplasty Recovery System. When we launch this fall, I’ll be offering a special "Founding Member" price for one week only. If you want to make sure you're the first to get the invite before that window closes, hop on the waitlist below.

[Click To Join The Deep Water Waitlist]

600 1st Ave, Ste 330 PMB 92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2246
Unsubscribe · Preferences

Lighthouse Transitions

The Weekly Beacon is your source code for the physical and mental mechanics of transition. Join 45+ crew members navigating the journey with confidence.

Read more from Lighthouse Transitions

Voiding trials are often the most stressful part of Stage 2. You’ve waited years for this moment, and suddenly, the "mental block" hits. My Story: I couldn't void for 5 days. I was cleared by my surgeon, my anatomy was ready, but my brain wouldn't let go. I cried every day. It felt like I was failing at the one thing I wanted most. The Tactical Toolkit: 1. FlowMax: This was a game-changer for me. It relaxes the pelvic floor. 2. Sensory Tricks: Run the water, blow bubbles through a straw, or...

The good news about Stage 2? You have both arms back! You don’t have to support your penis while you wash, which makes showering feel like a massive luxury compared to Stage 1. The Reality Check: • The Shower: It is completely normal to see some blood drip from your penis when you’re drying off. Since you aren't propped, gravity is doing its thing. Just pat dry and get back into your propping setup. • The Toilet (BMs): This is the tricky part. The vaginectomy stitches are very close to the...

Wound care in Stage 2 is less about massive grafts and more about precision. Your main job is protecting the glans and managing the vaginectomy and scrotum sites. The Tactical Glans Setup: When you wrap your glans with Xeroform, here is the pro tip most people miss: Tuck the Xeroform underneath the ridge. You can use a clean butter knife to gently guide it. This helps maintain the shape and prevents the glans from flattening as it heals. The Vaginectomy Site: No bandages here, but plenty of...